>It's still hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that we teach people to multiply matrices with pencil and paper[1], but not how to find a life partner and start a family.
Algebra 100 years ago was nearly the exact same. Maybe we teach it differently but the concepts are the same.
As you mention, what people want and find okay in a relationship varies quickly and is individualistic as well as societal. 100 years ago most of the world didn't care if you married your first cousin, how well would that advice age in the 2000's? You may even find that advice that your parents used that got them married is completely useless for you, advice as recent as a generational gap.
There isn't a good way for a school system to teach these things. Just the basic health aspects such as sex as a mechanic and healthy living (food, hygiene, exercise, disease, etc). Everything else is up to you.
> what people want and find okay in a relationship varies quickly and is individualistic
All evidence says the opposite of this. You’re just making unscientific guesses.
Human biology, sexuality, instincts and desires have not changed. We’re the same hairless apes we were a hundred years ago or even ten thousand years ago. In fact, very little has changed for a hundred thousand or more years!
> Everything else is up to you.
This is the problem! We just assume young adults will figure it out without any education or experience to guide them.
Worse still, society has changed so radically that pair bonding difficulty has been dialed up to “ultra hardcore mode” and as a species we’ve collectively shrugged our shoulders and told people that it’s their own fault for not compensating.
It’s not what people want in a spouse that has changed. It’s the society around them that has diverged from millions of years of established norms.
you're using macro biology to predict micro behaviors. the latter can't be predicted with science. "Science" also says that homosexuality makes no sense, but we know how that ends.
You're not going to meet 3.5 billion women in your life to play the scientific odds with, round robin style. You need to understand your own country and customs and work in that system, or move to an environment whose dating scene agrees with you. No one can do that legwork for you as an anonymous handle on the internet.
>We just assume young adults will figure it out without any education or experience to guide them.
Yes, just like how we don't have specific lessons on how not to insult people or about curse words. Part of your learning will be environmental, and it shouldn't be something a government mandates. You'll get micro guidances from teachers but there's no textbook out there on these ettiquite.
>society has changed so radically that pair bonding difficulty has been dialed up to “ultra hardcore mode” and as a species we’ve collectively shrugged our shoulders and told people that it’s their own fault for not compensating.
Probably because most people are fine. There's no epidemic where no one can get dates to the prom, nor where child birth rates have fallen off a cliff (They have decreased, but not becasue people aren't dating).
Similar to how unemployment rates are never 0%, there are always some people who fall through the cracks socially. It may have different causes, but the result isn't a new phenomenon. There is no one magical scientific trick to solve this problem. But if you want to play the odds
- Be attractive. If you're not, work on it. This is not limited to looks, but that is the easiest aspect to play to.
- Be financially stable
- Make an effort to find people interested in dating. This gets harder after school ends, but there are still avenues.
Algebra 100 years ago was nearly the exact same. Maybe we teach it differently but the concepts are the same.
As you mention, what people want and find okay in a relationship varies quickly and is individualistic as well as societal. 100 years ago most of the world didn't care if you married your first cousin, how well would that advice age in the 2000's? You may even find that advice that your parents used that got them married is completely useless for you, advice as recent as a generational gap.
There isn't a good way for a school system to teach these things. Just the basic health aspects such as sex as a mechanic and healthy living (food, hygiene, exercise, disease, etc). Everything else is up to you.